A Mother and ADaughter

 “She is all I have and I want to do so much, but I have got so little time left “thought Sarah.

Sarah told John to look out for her precious angel, she is going to be heartbroken. John was more concerned about Sarah rather than their daughter. Sarah was dying after a long struggle with cancer. It took almost five years, but she had a full life.

    A young teacher loved by her students and respected by her colleagues . She was a girl next door. She was made on order to be a beautiful wife and a great daughter in law.

    When their daughter Nickie was in 7^th grade Sarah  was diagnosed with cancer. She had her lump removed and got better for a while. She was elated when her results came back positive. She has always been a fighter, though she could not fight for her daughter. She has always been busy with her household chores and managing her house.

In her daily duties she forgot that she had a daughter and a beautiful one with a heart of gold. She thought she had enough time to develop her relation with her daughter . She had John to take care of first who needed her constantly for small things and big things.

     One day when Nickie came home she found all her relatives and instantly knew that her mom must be ill , lately her condition has been deteriorating . She could not see her so she went to her room and opened her books. She was not a spoiled brat but a shy girl who sometimes acted like a total tomboy. She was blossoming like a flower. But as the time knew her mother was getting worse. John was not very rich but he took good care of them. He knew his wife was leaving him her body was too weak but did not show his concern.

   He was praying each and every day for just one more day. He knew it will be difficult without her.

    Nickie started spending more time in school and planning her day in extracurricular activities ,just to be away from that dreadful place called home.

   She could not understand how her mother would be leaving. They have not yet talked about anything yet. She never told her how she felt. How upset she was and how lonely she would be. She never shared anything with her but now she wanted. She could not understand why she is leaving her when she needs her the most. Nickie was broken inside but she put on a brave face for everyone so that no one would pay attention to her. She came home ate whatever was made and shut herself in her room with music blasting.

    One day she came home and saw that her mother was critical. She was breathing hard and a nurse was taking care of her. She swallowed her tears and went in her mother’s room.

  Sarah was happy to see Nickie home. She knew it is just matter of days now so she did not want to waste her time with Nickie. She took her daughter’s hand in hers and with tears welling up she said  “my angel, I am sorry!”

   In those few words she said everything she ever wanted to say to her daughter. She was sorry that she had no time.

   She was sorry that she could not see her teenage daughter grow up.

   She was sorry that she could not see her daughter graduate or get a job or go on a date. No time to share jokes or anecdotes or simple incidents from the mundane life.

  But mostly sorry because she won’t be able to see her daughter as a bride , a married lady and a mother.

  Those final words all Nickie could remember and she would get past anything.

                             “My angel I am sorry”